For the majority of this trip I have been around other people. My cousin joined me for a portion of it - which I am ever grateful for - and I stayed with friends, visited with friends, and just hung out. But the last 4 days of my trip have been all about me. Flying solo. Thinking, living in the moment, being true to whatever I want to do. I eat whatever and whenever I want. I stop the car off the side of the road to snap a picture, I sit for hours at a time - sometimes doing nothing at all.
There is this incredibly freeing feeling that has become norm. There are moments I am scared. A split second when I stop and say - I'm alone. And then that passes. Because I know it's momentary and I should enjoy it while I have it.
I wake in a hotel room by myself. I use the hotel gym! - I don't know WHEN the last time was that I had the time nor desire to use a hotel gym. I go for a swim. I sit outside on the patio just 30 minutes until check out because I can. I have no one telling me I have to go get ready. I have no one to feel accountable to but myself. It's purely and refreshingly me. And I kinda like me.
I know this won't last long. I know that this is a slice, a small sliver of time where I live in this moment and live alone. But instead of worrying if it'll be my constant state, I have make a conscious decision to relish it. These are the moments that make up our big beautiful lives. And we have a choice to make in each of those moments. Enjoy it? Or constantly anticipate something bigger and better?
Today, I'm choosing to enjoy.
1 comment:
Nice!
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